Hello, family. I have to come clean about something. Ever since Pete Carroll murdered my Pick 5 last night, I’ve been listening to a lot of one particular artist. Because…essentially…Pete Carroll let me down.

Why is this song soothing me in my time of despair? Is it because the man Billy Baggins Simmons once called “Coach Fredo” has fucked my spirit in two? Or is it because NF is actually a really good musician? Here’s another one that has weaseled it’s way into my playlists:

Holy shit. This is guy is like Eminem fucked Adam Levine and Bono and their DNA amalgamated into a sober rapper who spits love songs to his exes and family. I can’t control myself. I need more.

This is a problem. How can I call myself a Stickman in training and listen to this cat? How can I continue to build relationships with my non-Backwoods smokin’ dudes in the CWE with this blaring out of the JL? And yet…I’m drawn to young NF. I refuse to learn anything about him other than I know he’s sober because a bunch of millennial dipshits who try to get sober in LA love him. Other than that, he shall remain a beautiful voice getting listened to shamefully in my whip.

HOLD ON! I HAVE SOMETHING TO GET ME OUT OF THIS! GOOD GOD! THAT’S PREEMO’S MUSIC!