A-Train Watches: Hotel Artemis.

I’m back to blogging. I know the post have been few and far between of late. This week I’m diving back into it with a review of Hotel Artemis. Hotel Artemis is my kind of movie. It’s got a lot of colorful villains doing colorful villain shit, all set in the backdrop of a futuristic LA Riot. I think this movie takes place in 2028. So a mere 10 years into the future.

I liked Hotel Artemis, I didn’t love it. The reason I didn’t love it was that it could have been better. The Jenny Slate thread is hamfisted into the plot and completely unnecessary, and it takes away from why we came to see the film. We came to see the bad guys.

If you don’t know, Hotel Artemis is a members-only bad guy hospital with very strict rules. Jodie Foster plays the head doctor/nurse and her only other employee is an orderly played by Bautista. I don’t know if it’s just me who thinks that Bautista is the best part of every movie that he’s in, but this is no exception. Bautista steals the show. I need this guy in more films.

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The film follows Foster and Bautista as they try to deal with the influx of bad guys coming to the Artemis. Things start to really get out of hand when “The Wolf King” (The Man who runs LA and owns the Artemis) needs to get treatment as well.

Stylistically the movie looks great, it’s well shot. Fairly well acted, and for the most part, has no gaping plot holes…but I still walked out wanting a little something more. I wanted more of the bad guys. I wanted a little more story. The problem was I don’t see how you fit it all into a movie without making it super long. I don’t know if my readers are familiar with the movie “4 Rooms” but I would have liked to see this film told in that manner. I think it would have made for a more interesting movie.

I’m giving this movie my stamp of approval, it’s definitely a “guy” movie but I think lots of ladies will enjoy it too. Still, I think Hotel Artemis might work better as a Netflix TV series where we could get more into the backstory of each player in the game.

Before we go I need to mention Sofia Boutella. This woman is a nuclear missile. I first was introduced to her in Atomic Blonde. In Hotel Artemis she plays a very similar character, beautiful but fierce, not to be trifled with. She was great in Hotel Artemis and I look forward to seeing her in a lot more. She’s going to be a full-on movie star.

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EDIT: Just googled Sofia Boutella assuming she was like 26 years old…..she’s like 6 months older than I am! I think that makes her even hotter. Where have you been all my life Sofia!!! This age revelation does make me worry about my movie star proclamation. In about 5 years she’s going to have to start playing someone’s mom. I don’t make these rules Hollywood does.

Go see Hotel Artemis if for no other reason than to support a movie that isn’t a remake or a comic book movie. A-TRAIN OUT!

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