PBM vs. Bodie: Name the Best Athletes Turned Actors

My people! What’s good? Ya boy was just perusing some Twitter, and a great blog idea fell into my lap. JD Williams, aka Bodie from “The Wire” and Kenny Wangler from “Oz,” tweeted his list of best athletes turned actors. Here’s a pic of Bodie for you pathetic pigeon peasants who haven’t seen either show:

bodie

Here’s Bodie’s list:

bodie list

That’s a terrible list. I only looked at it the once to ensure I didn’t mirror his picks via cheating, and admittedly I didn’t realize Carl Weathers played pro football. If I’m being honest, I said to myself, “what a dope – Chubbs Peterson aka Apollo Creed aka CIA Billy isn’t an athlete.” One point for Bodie. Another point for his Bubba Smith inclusion, who I loved as kid when he was doing Hightower things in “Police Academy.” Bodie leads 2-0. Not for long. Here’s my off the dome, five minutes worth, and Google free reply:

pbm better reply

I used the Toadstool mushroom to block my avatar because it’s that pic is your boy and the current Ms. PBM – confidential + gender neutral. I’m figuring this shit out, people (not even close). Notice the two minute mark on the retweet! I concocted this response in less time than it takes to wipe butts. Let’s do some more scoring, shall we? Bodie loses a point for including Bradshaw in that bucket list movie. He loses a point for Ferrigno because that means we both could have used Arnold. Tie ball game. PBM signals for the Huggy Bear press aka my monster of a list, and it’s light out. How does he not include Batista and Andre if he’s listing wrestlers? Batista is LIGHTS OUT on the big screen right now, and Fezik is one of the all time great supporting comedic roles. Quick two for PBM. Sticking with comedy – he left off Nordberg, Sea Bass, Uncle Drew, and Johnny Mac when he was egging cars in “Mr. Deeds.” 6-0, PBM. We both had Jim Brown, which baffles me that Bodie left off his cast mate from “Any Given Sunday,” LT. LT is PERFECTION as Shark. I’m up a touchdown. I’m blown away that Shaq got no love for “Blue Chips” and “Uncle Drew” – Shaq has his clunkers, but he’s pretty electric when he’s not the one financing the films and/or starring in them. I don’t expect Bodie to know that Cousy is the AD in “Blue Chips” and that they never had to cut during his free throw scenes. I also don’t expect him to list Keith Hernandez’s dynamite stretch on “Seinfeld” or when Modano and McRae proclaim that Gordan Bombay “ruled the peewee’s” in the first Mighty Ducks. I’ll even excuse the absence of Shaq because of shit like “Kazaam.” But one thing jumped out at me about Bodie/Kenny’s list that was downright shocking:

pbm response better

Did Kenny and Jackson Vahue have real life beef on “Oz?” How is Fox left off his list? They did multiple seasons of television together, and Fox didn’t just play a hooper. He had some serious character turns, and in my not so humble opinion, absolutely CRUSHED the role. To see an example of an NBA player doing the opposite, watch Malik Sealy (RIP) opposite Fox in “Eddie.” Fox isn’t lighting the world on fire as a philandering third option on the Knicks who uses Whoopi as a coach and marriage counselor, but Malik is AWFUL as Stacey Patton (the team’s MVP). Speaking of “Eddie,” I fucking left off Spider Salley! He’s great as the aging vet in that landfill of a movie and is hilarious in “Bad Boys.” Ok, back to “Oz…”

Here’s a clip of Fox’s Jackson Vahue’s back story – pure intensity!

Fast forward to 2:40 of Fox’s acting reel to see him emote as his character is getting sober following getting hooked on heroin + getting his Achilles cut in prison (if you watch the whole reel, peep Fox with Shuttlesworth – forgot about that role):

How can you deny that presence? Fox is one handsome man, and he’s actually halfway decent in a variety of styles. The slight of Fox brings the final tally to PBM 15 and Bodie -5. There’s gotta be a reason these two don’t get along, and I’m guessing Fox snagged one of Bodie’s ladies while on set for “Oz.” If Big Cat can get Durant and McCollum beefing, PBM can get Rick Fox and Bodie beefing. I want the true story, gents! The evidence suggesting long standing resentment is crystal clear. I’ll let you rail riders by the judge – legit beef or nah?

 

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