Another Edition of “A-Train Watches.” This time A-Train watches “Rampage”

Rampage, just like Kong Skull Island is a movie meant for the big screen. If you wait for it on dvd/streaming you are going to be disappointed. Side Note: Do films even come out on DVD anymore? I honestly can’t remember the last time I physically put a DVD in a DVD player. Go see Rampage in the theater if big summer blockbuster type movie is your thing. Don’t expect any good dialogue, there isn’t any save a couple charisma drops from The Rock. Every non-action scene in this film (not featuring the villains I’ll get to them) is pretty terrible. Luckily this movie is mostly action and is not terribly long.

Brief Plot Synopsis: Evil Corporation Energyne conducts illegal genetic experiments in space, three canisters jettisoned from space land in three different places in the US. Each Cannister is found by a different animal, and three giant monsters come out of it. Chaos ensues when the CEO of Energyne activates a radio frequency that draws all three animals towards Chicago. The Rock plays an ex-army primatologist (lol) who’s albino gorilla friend George is one of the infected animals. Aided by an ex-corporate scientist who tried to blow the whistle on the experiments, the two follow the path of destruction to try and save George as well as the city of Chicago.

Energyne, the corporate villain of the film is headed up by a brother and sister, Claire and Brett Wyden. Claire (played by Malin Ackerman) is the “brains” of the operation while Brett (played by Jake Lacy) is her not-so-bright little brother who dresses like he’s still in prep school. Brett’s dumb ass was lowkey my favorite part of the movie. Every scene in this movie without action was terrible save the scenes with the over-the-top campy performances of the Wyden Siblings. Come to think of it, they may have been eerie caricatures of the Trump kids.

I don’t think anyone but The Rock could have starred in this movie, he was great. He did the best he could with a shitty script, without The Rock this movie goes from a solid (B) to a barely passing grade (D) in the blink of an eye.

I recommend seeing it in the theater or don’t see it at all, it goes pretty quick, I didn’t even finish my soda before it was done.